A short story by Charlie Lehman …

I look over to my right from David West’s hand on the counsel table and up to his face. Deputy Public Defender David West is a perfectionist, and he appreciates me. I had assisted him on only one case. The slight shake of his head reassured me further. My lawyer’s idea of keeping me in an LA County jumpsuit is helping. The further humiliation stimulates guilty amusement and additional sympathy in the judge. She knows this is overkill. I’m thinking, it’s gonna be all right.

I look up at the young woman in the black robe. She gives me a similar shake of her head. I had assisted in her former courtroom – night court arraignments.

Judge Candace Beach announces: “The people of the State of California versus Otto Parz, Case # BD 0928221, Deputy District Attorney Donna Messer for the People, Deputy Public Defender David West for the defense. Mr. West, I have read your Motion to Dismiss and am inclined to grant it. Miss. Messer?”

“The People are ready to call Dr. Alice Wong, the victim of Mr. Parz’s reckless and unlawful behavior. Mr. Parz triggered Dr. Wong’s anxiety from her mass shooting event during her college . . .”

David West, a Hamid Karzai look-alike, is on his feet. “Objection, your Honor. As I pointed out in my moving papers, the presence of Mr. Parz’s revolver at his optometry appointment was necessary. He informed Dr. Wong of the necessity to produce it, as a response to her question, ‘Is there anything else?’ He needed it to illustrate his inability to get anything better than a fuzzy image of his front sight. Mr. Parz slowly dialed the number of the padlock on his gun case and slowly removed his revolver. Dr. Wong did not object or react in any way observable to my client.”

The DA is also on her feet. “She was frozen, terrified! She . . .”

West interrupts: “Objection. Any possible testimony of Dr. West is inadmissible. Privileged. Doctor-patient privilege. The People have no evidence and no case.”

Judge Beach answers quickly: “Motion granted. Mr. Parz, you are free to go.”

The stocky DA has one more shot. “Your Honor, it’s the policy of the District Attorney to have firearms in these cases destroyed.”

The judge raises her voice above it all. “Not in my court, Miss. Messer. I order Mr. Parz’s property returned to him by the close of today’s business, which is less than four hours from now, and I trust that Mr. West will see to compliance.”